It's been a year, yet I feel like we were close a day ago. Everything changed. I'm in a different place, surrounded by different people, with different thoughts and different dreams. Everything is different, yet when it comes to you, it's all the same. I haven't heard a word from you in months, yet the taste of your affection is still fresh in my memory.
Do you remember how you said we were sisters separated by some cruel twist of fate?
Whenever something happens, be it happy or sad, I think of how to tell it to you, imagine your reaction. I ask for your advice whenever faced with a decision with the littlest bit of significance. I pick out the songs to send, pictures to show, ideas to share.
We were two halves of the same whole, so similar I couldn't tell where you ended and I began. Any disagreement with you scared me as much as if a part of me suddenly declared war. You were the only person in the whole world who could truly understand me and who I felt like I wholly understood.
I guess I can say I learned a lot. I learned not to tell people the truth all the time. I learned to never take out my irritability on those completely innocent. However, I did not learn the main lesson. That day, one year ago, I swore to never hurt and lose someone I deeply care about for anything other than an irreversible turn of events. I promised, tears in my eyes, to fight for those I love and not give in to the heat of the moment.
I guess I didn't deserve your friendship.
I didn't deserve to get cared for.
I didn't deserve you.
I would apologize, but no amount of text and tears can wash away my mistakes.
All I wanted to say was : it's been a year, yet I love you as though it hasn't been a day.”